Margaret J. Meeker, M.D., author of Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters: 10 Secrets Every Father Should Know, starts her first chapter as a call for good men. She asks men give “all their strength and wit” because they are the ones above all others that set the course for their daughters.

What do I know about being a father? In the 11 years I have been working directly with dads, I’ve heard the question from fathers, some mothers and other experts in the fatherhood field. Every time I have been asked, my response is I am a daughter. And as the daughter of a not perfect, yet still amazing father, I know the important things my father gave me. First and foremost, he gave me his time, his attention and his unconditional love. When I wanted to play softball, he signed up to be an assistant coach. When I wanted to play basketball - his game - he taught me the fundamentals and then coached our team to three undefeated seasons. When it was discovered that I have a learning disability, he made sure I knew that no matter what anyone said, I was not stupid and I would do great things. When a friend became pregnant in high school, the discussion we had was pretty simple. Dad said, “I would be very disappointed if you became pregnant now. Of course I would still love you. Later I will dance, but now I would be very disappointed.”

As a family, we moved every three-five years as my father worked for the government. When I decided I didn’t like moving away from my friends and my school, my Dad promised that when I started high school, we would not move until I graduated. But when the government decided he needed to move three different places in three years and I was still in high school, he made it work for me. He went so far as to sign over guardianship to another not perfect, yet amazing man. He was a man of his word. When it comes down to it, my father gave me confidence, courage, strength, wisdom and above all, unconditional love.

So the call I give to all fathers, grandfathers, uncles, and good men is to be a not perfect, yet amazing father or role model. If you don’t know what that means, then ask, find a class, talk to other men and don’t forget to talk to the daughters in your lives – your mother, your sisters, your aunts, your co-workers - women you consider strong, successful and wise. They will tell you what they know about fathers as they were more than likely than not raised by some not perfect, yet amazing men.

-Betsy Sweetland is the program administrator for the Central Visitation Fatherhood Program located in Denver, Colorado.